Home School at Home or in the Schools

Using Schools to Teach your Children -- It Can Be Done

The stead is the healthy, self-contained  thing, the permanent thing, the thing that stands.

The steader is the one who builds and lives the stead.

-The Steader Manifesto

The original stead is the man or woman, and then their family.  A couple in the city raising their kids to be healthy and have kids is steadier than the couple with a beautiful permaculture venue that is going to be sold off when they die.  That sounds harsh to say.  Let’s qualify it by saying that the permaculture venue is still a thing of beauty while it lasts.  Lets also admit that no one can control their kids and the cultural head winds trying to force them into mass atomized consumer society are strong.  But that makes it all the more impressive when a family succeeds.

So let’s talk homeschooling.  First, let’s get our mindset right.

Mindset — You ARE a Homeschooler

Henry V, Shakespeare:  All things be ready, if our mind be so.

The first piece is that it is absolutely worth quitting your job, moving across country or out of the country, or living in the cabin in the woods, whatever it takes, to save your kids.   Whatever it takes. But . . . if you are willing to do that, you rarely need to.  We are talking saving your children from being consumed of course.  Don’t do any of that stuff just so your child can have “a better education.”  Better education doesn’t matter very much.  Most efforts to improve education don’t make any difference, and even the ones that do, well, the kids mostly turn out the way they are going to turn out anyway.  Raising kids makes a lot more difference than educating them does.  So take it easy. 

Be willing to do whatever it takes, but also take it easy?  Yes.

The second piece is that you absolutely must home school even if your kids continue to attend a public or private school.  Not a paradox.   Instead it’s a mindset shift.    The proper mindset is that you are your child’s main teacher and if you choose to use public schools or private schools or tutors or co-ops or programs as part of your home schooling, you may, it can work just fine, as long as you continue to realize that you are the teacher, the kid is your student, and you are just using the institutional school as one of your tools.

In this post you will get a guide to home school steading using public or private schools.  In the next post we will give you a simple, easy to use on-ramp for highly effective teaching at home that any parent can use.

This is all based on experience, has been applied by us, and has been found to work.  Every piece of advice we give here is something we have tried and tested and proven true.  None of this is attitude.

The Decision to Incorporate Institutional Schooling Into Your Home School

You don’t have an easy decision to make. But you are bright and capable, yes you are.  Providence helps out people who are trying to do the right things.  And kids are resilient.  Trust that you can make the right call at any given time.

We can never have the intimate special knowledge and love that you have for your children.  We can never replace your judgment. So here are some things to think about that should supplement, but not replace, your own thinking on whether or not to use institutional schools as part of your home school.

• If you ever get a whiff that there is actual child molestation or grooming for molestation at your school, get out.  Very few teachers are molesters, but many molesters are teachers.  Get out, don’t look back.

• If your child is at risk from serious injuries because of an anarchic brutalized school environment that allows other students to give free rein to their violent tendencies, get out.

• How hostile is the school? Virtually no public schools and very few private ones are steader friendly.  But some are much more hostile to your family project than others.  If the school seems hellbent on “consuming” your child, get out. 

• If you ever get a hint that the school system may be trying to medicalize or institutionalize your child against your will, or insert your family into the social worker system, cut and run immediately, and don’t stop running until you are out of their sight. 

• If you see your child transform from the bright and friendly kid you know to someone sullen and withdrawn, pull the plug.   Change schools, stop using institutional schooling completely, do something.  Reject the lie—rebellious, sullen teenagers is not natural.  It is a sign that something has seriously gone wrong.

• If your kids falls in with the wrong crowd and you can’t shake them, cut bait.

• If you cannot or will not follow the guidelines below for home schooling through the institutional schools, then don’t.

A key insight here is that it is ok to use institutional schooling as part of your toolset at one time and not another. It is ok to use it with one child and not another.

How to Home School through Public or Private Schools

None of this is easy, but it can be done. If you can’t manage it, no problem, just home school the normal way.

First, last, and always, mindset.  You are not public schooling.  You are home schooling through the public schools.  Remind yourself early and often. In addition,

1. talk to your teachers and administrators frequently (don’t use other parents’ involvement as your measuring stick)

2. talk to your kids frequently and ask searching questions

3. know your rights under state and federal law

4. talk to your child frequently and ask searching questions

5. continue to provide supplemental education at home, you must be willing to supplement

6. make sure your child is reading on his own

7. try to eliminate as much busy work as possible.

8. exploit the school system. To paraphrase the Master, man was not meant to serve the school system, but the school system was meant to serve man.  Be a buccaneer.  If you don’t occasionally bully a teacher or school administrator, you are not succeeding. This advice is harsh but we have found it to be true.  If you are a deeply agreeable person then you are a credit to your parents and a joy to be around and should not use institutional schools as part of your home school.

9. read the home schooling guide coming up next on the Steader and adapt it for your situation.  Decide what else you are doing besides the institutional school. Because mindset mindset mindset you are home schooling. 

CONCLUSION

Every well-educated child is home schooled, except that some parents use the formal instruction provided by local governments or private institutions as part of their approach.

Every child should be home schooled.  A child is “home schooled” while in public or private schools if the child's father and mother take charge of the child's education.

 Next: the simple, easy guide to home schooling.  Anyone can.